if love was

i was waiting
for so long
that I couldn’t remember
whether i was waiting for
love
or inspiration
or you
to
swim up inside of
my womb implant
on the back wall of the
endometrium
and shake the belly loose
like sunlight dispels darkness
you were my psalmist
my warm blanket on a cold night
good man, woman honoring request
from God
to help me
meet Him
in all the places
that He decided i should be
giving the simple gift of me
learning that what’s priceless is always
free, knowing that real truth you’ll never see
and i must’ve been waiting on love
because you came
and i stayed the same
and if love was really real,
why wouldn’t he find
me, rescue me,
heal me, stay with me,
lay with me… stand in front of God and
pray with me
why wouldn't he?
come quickly
surely, greatly, purely come immediately
why, has not love come
to me?